home bound

returning to utah from back east last weekend felt like coming home and it threw me off a little. home is what i've called many places in the last couple of years but something I haven't felt for any of them. and here it is, where I thought i'd be gone come january, then fall. it was a challenge to accept that moving around a lot will come to an end for a while. because it was easy to tell myself everything will be even better once i move. it made me not try as hard and made me dream up a future instead of tackling what's in front of me. but then i understood that not the moving makes me happy but what i fill my life with, what i chose to see in my photos and who i spend time with. poof went all the fear of being stuck. stagnating. becoming mediocre, sedentary and disillusioned. ok, I still want to keep moving around. but for now utah not just is home but feels home.